I always wanted to be a dad. I would tell myself by the time I was 35 I would be a dad. I didn’t know how but by the time I was 35… Well, three years ago I turned 35. I found myself living in the Middle East, on a small desert Island of Bahrain. I had my own successful production company selling shows to Netflix and other linear broadcasters. I was opening a Performing Arts school, the first of its kind within the region. I was flying to Italy and France, Thailand to Canada. I had fallen in love with my now ex, traveling every chance I had to meet him. Yeah! I was not thinking about children.
Last year, 37-year-old me started thinking about my lifelong dream of having a child. I thought, how am I going to do this? How is a gay man going to have a child? My ex is an incredible artist. His art is his life. So when the talk came, from my end, about having a child, a clear separation in our paths became very evident. Our relationship lasted for 6 months after that, but as my internal-self told me, it inevitably came to an end.
People think I’m crazy going through this journey on my own. But the way I look at it, if a single mother can raise a child, work, cook and clean and take care of everything on her own, then why can’t I? And who knows maybe along the way I will meet someone that holds me and says, ‘Let’s do this together. Everything is going to be okay’.
I researched a lot about ways of getting a child. I looked into adoption, but as a single man living in the Middle East, it was close to impossible. Besides the years I would have to wait, the endless papers to fill and sign and the remote possibilities of what kind of child I would get. The thought of adoption quickly left my mind, and I started looking into Surrogacy.
I looked at Canada and US with prices that were way out of my means. $120 000 to start I think is a little steep. I think some government support should be given to help people that really want a family. Through my continued research, I came across Kiran Infertility Center in Hyderabad, India. India had just past a law that stated that one of the intended parents must have an Indian passport. Luckily they had just opened new clinics in Nepal, Ukraine, Russia, and Kenya. When looking at the countries laws, the only one where a single man can have a child was Kenya. So 45 000 US dollars later, I find myself on a plane to Mombasa, on my 38 birthday ready to face whatever God has in store for me.