I always wanted to be a dad. I used to tell myself that by the time I turned 35, I would be a dad. I didn’t know how, but I was determined to make it happen. Well, three years ago, I turned 35. At that time, I found myself living in the Middle East, on a small desert island in Bahrain. I had my own successful production company, selling shows to Netflix and other broadcasters. I was also opening a performing arts school, the first of its kind in the region. I was flying to Italy, France, Thailand, and Canada. I had fallen in love with my now ex, and we travelled every chance we had to see each other. Needless to say, having children was not on my mind at that time.
Last year, when I turned 37, I started thinking about my lifelong dream of having a child. I asked myself, “How am I going to do this? How can a gay man have a child?” My ex is an incredible artist, and his art is his life. When I brought up the idea of having a child, it became clear that we were on different paths. Although our relationship lasted for six more months, it eventually came to an end.
People think I’m crazy for embarking on this journey alone, but I look at it differently. If a single mother can raise a child, work, cook, clean, and take care of everything on her own, why can’t I? Who knows? Maybe along the way, I will meet someone who will hold me and say, “Let’s do this together. Everything will be okay.”
I did a lot of research on ways to have a child. I looked into adoption, but as a single man living in the Middle East, it was almost impossible. Besides the years of waiting, endless paperwork to fill and sign, and the remote possibility of getting the kind of child I wanted, I quickly dismissed the thought of adoption. Instead, I started looking into surrogacy.
I looked at Canada and the US, but the prices were way out of my reach. Starting at $120,000, I think that’s a bit steep. I believe that the government should provide support to help people who really want to have a family. During my research, I came across the Kiran Infertility Center in Hyderabad, India. India had just passed a law stating that one of the intended parents must have an Indian passport. Luckily, they had just opened new clinics in Nepal, Ukraine, Russia, and Kenya. After looking at each country’s laws, I found that Kenya was the only place where a single man could have a child. So, $45,000 later, I found myself on a plane to Mombasa, on my 38th birthday, ready to face whatever God has in store for me.
