My Journey to Fatherhood

Travel

Kenya
What can I say about Kenya? Well, first of all, let’s talk about my state of mind. I was in a dream-like state, kinda living it in slow motion. I couldn’t believe that I flew halfway around the world to this 3rd world country and was about to cum in a cup to have a baby! Being Alone didn’t help. Don’t get me wrong; this is what I want more than anything, but there are times where I question my decision. And not having anyone there to tell you that everything will be ok, was and is tough.

Kenya is beautiful for sure but none the less a third world country. Even if you want the comforts of a 5-stars, you need to be satisfied with 3-star service. I was there for six days in total. On every second day, at 9:00 am, I walked a short distance to the clinic and deposited my semen. Let’s just say being a 3rd world mostly Islamic society they had no internet and needless to say no porn! Let alone gay porn!

So I walk into this pink room, pull down my pants and try to imagine something nasty, while still thinking positive, loving thoughts about this life that I’m about to create. It took me a while to finish. I hand over my boys to the technician, wash my hands and sit in a room watching him examine my semen. He took me through all the steps of preparing the semen for transfer. This happened three more times during the week.

The rest of the time I spent sleeping and relaxing, reading “Gay Dads” and Amy Schumer’s “The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo.” (I needed something funny to get my mind off of everything.) The night before the last deposit I read a chapter in “Gay Dads” where this gay couple had triplets with the surrogate, and I almost threw myself off the balcony!! Triplets!! No.

In the hotel, I met a gay couple, Cliff and Alexander. They were also going through the same thing as me. Having another couple going through the same thing was great. The same questions, the same fears, same doubts, but also the same love and passion for this new chapter of our lives. I also meet a doctor that was writing about the lost culture of eastern African Music. She showed me around the old town of Mombasa and thanks to her I saw the beauty of a simpler life. Not that I would want to live it, but it was pretty beautiful.


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